Sunday, March 12, 2017

WTF? Beyond Valkyrie: Dawn of the 4th Reich (2016)


                Each year I check on what war movies are being planned for the future.  Often there are movies that sound interesting on paper and I look forward to someday seeing them.  As I look back over the years, many of those intriguing titles never made it into production.  And some, unfortunately, did.  This leads me to wonder two things: 1.  Why do good movies not get made?  2.  Why do bad movies get green-lighted?  “Beyond Valkyrie” fits in the second category.  It was directed by Claudio Fah.  Remember that name.  He’s going to be big someday.  Or not.  The movie went straight-to-video which still means that it got further than a bunch of the titles I had been looking forward to.  Life is not fair.

                The movie begins with a title card that informs us that Germany is losing the war, but the Nazis are stockpiling something in East Prussia.  In England, “Operation Jedburgh” has the mission of going behind enemy lines to bring out a German officer who is part of Operation Valkyrie (the attempt on Hitler’s life).  The movie is unclear about why they need this guy, but don’t worry about it - the script doesn’t.  A below average CGI transport plane gets shot down and our four commandoes are on their own.  They are led by Capt. Blackburn (Sean Patrick Flanery) and include a crusty sergeant played by Tom Sizemore.  If you continue watching after Sizemore’s involvement in the movie, you are truly a war movie fan and/or a masochist.  Either way, keep drinking.
 
                Our quartet hooks up with four Soviets led by Maj. Kulkov (Pasha Lychnikoff).  There is a Mexican standoff before the Allies bond.  They are joined by a hot spy (actress Julie Engelbrecht in case you want to skip the movie and see just this scene)  who gratuitously shows her breasts to assure us we are watching a straight-to-video movie.  The band of brothers are trapped in a house by Nazis leading to a ridiculous shootout with the usual German mindless assaulters being mowed down. Think "Where Eagles Dare".  Then it’s on to rescue the good Nazi while being chased by the evil Nazi.  It all gets a bit redundant with prodigious expenditure of ammo.  The German soldiers are worse shots than Imperial Stormtroopers. 

                “Beyond Valkyrie” is not the sequel to the Tom Cruise movie that you were hoping for.  And this time they still don’t get Hitler.  What we have here is the classic straight-to-DVD bait and switch involving a title.  Of course, if you are fooled by the title, you get what you deserve.  And that means terrible effects, terrible acting, terrible dialogue… you get the idea.  Or I could have simply said you get Tom Sizemore. 


GRADE  =  F   

11 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  2. It is very interesting the involvement of Argentina and Juan Peron to hide the nazis after a generous retribution
    Is this real? Did it happen?

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  3. The tits were great...

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  4. Read Grey Wolf: Hitler's Escape to Argentina for the real story. No tits.

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  5. I watched the first 20 minutes of the movie thinking wow! this movie is so boring it must be based on some historical and restricting hard facts. So I googled 'Beyond Valkyrie Dawn of the fourth reich, historical accuracy'

    The very first thing that popped up brought me here. I spent what, 2 minutes reading this? I Had ten times more enjoyment in those 2 minutes than in the first half hour of the movie.

    I feel I have been given a great service here.

    60 more minutes in life for something worth my time.

    Thank you

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  6. I loved it. What's wrong with me?

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    1. Nothing. We all have our guilty pleasures. However, if you love all of Tom Sizemore's movies, get to a psychiatrist.

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  7. You stated that Tom Sizemore's character was one of the four paratroopers/commandos. He is not. He stays behind at HQ with the General.

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    1. I'll take your word for it. I'm not going to watch the movie again.

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  8. I really enjoyed this movie. anyone know why the switch of dog tags by American on American dead soldier?

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    1. Don't remember that part. And as I have said before, I have no intention of watching the movie again.

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