One
of the most memorable movies of my childhood was “633 Squadron”. It was right up there with “Von Ryan's Express”. One thing I have learned
through doing this blog is that sometimes childhood memories are best left
untampered with. Reviewing childhood
favorites as an adult can be a disillusioning experience. Since a recent rewatching of “633 Squadron”
revealed that I was sadly wrong about the quality of that movie, I was
expecting the worst in rewatching its lower budget kin “Mosquito
Squadron”. This nonsequel came out five
years later and tried to tap into the misplaced fondness for the original. It even used footage from that movie. And shrewdly borrowed the word
“squadron”. That was good marketing. The movie was directed by Boris Sagal who is
not a particularly renowned director, but he did have an interesting
death. He was filming the
miniseries“World War III” when he got off a helicopter and turned the wrong
way. His encounter with the tail rotor
did not end well.
The
movie opens with the launching of a V-1 and its hitting a building in
London. This is actually footage from
“Operation Crossbow”. We get a stirring
theme courtesy of Frank Cordell (a Mosquito veteran). A flight of Mosquitos is sent to bomb the
launch site. German fighters shoot down
Squadron Leader “Scotty” Scott. He is
almost surely killed. What a shame for
his best friend Quint Munroe (David McCallum).
Now he will have to comfort Scotty’s wife Beth (Suzanne Neve). Since war movies insist on love triangles,
one must wonder if Scotty is really dead. Munroe makes a recon mission on a
chateau. His plane gets hit and a fire
starts. Lucky for him the fire stays the
same size the whole time. That’s
extremely fortuitous for a man flying a wooden warplane. The recon photos reveal a tunnel on the
chateau grounds that is being used to develop secret weapons so a mission is
planned to bomb it using the same type of bouncing bombs used in “The
Dambusters”. The plan is complicated by
intelligence that reveals that the chateau is being used as a prison camp and
one of the prisoners is Scotty. It’s a
miracle! The mission can’t be scrubbed
because it is crucial to winning the war, naturally. Someone has the bright cinematic idea of
coordinating a prison break with the bombing raid. As long as they are going to be dropping
bombs, why not have some of them breech the chateau walls to help the prisoners
escape? And since we all love a good
fire-fight, how about if the French Resistance attacks to facilitate the
breakout? All this carrying on should
resolve that pesky love triangle.
It
turns out you cannot replicate the awesomeness of “633 Squadron” (except in
scoring). And since “633 Squadron” is
not actually awesome, that will give you an idea how bad “Mosquito Squadron”
is. The best word to describe it is
“cheesy”. The special effects are low
rent. The explosions are big and
gassy. The planes are small and
modelly. Say what you want about CGI,
it’s still better than models on wires.
Did you know that when you drop a bomb from a moving plane, it does not
go straight to the ground? Neither did
the special effects people. In this
movie, the bombers release right above the target and still hit it. Another cheesy element is the sappy romance
replete with sappy music. The love
triangle is classic cliché, but the movie does throw in a little twist by
having Scotty develop amnesia so he does not remember who he is and that he is
married to Beth. While that is original,
it is also plot-advancingly ridiculous.
The cherry on top is Scotty resolving this dilemma with a duel with a
tank. For a movie that eschews even
British humor, this scene does provide a good guffaw. You can elicit more chuckles if you drink
while watching the film, which I highly recommend. This will help with the wooden acting and the
cringe-inducing romance. Not to mention
the ludicrous plot which unbelievably was based on a equally ludicrous
historical operation called “Jericho”.
I’m not sure that a documentary on Operation Jericho would not end up
just as unbelievable. But at least the
documentary would not have a love triangle involving an amnesiacal fiery plane
crash survivor.
This
review has attempted to save you baby boomer, war movie lovers from revisiting
a fondly remembered curio that will just leave you depressed and questioning
your childhood memories. You’re welcome.
GRADE
= D-
HISTORICAL ACCURACY: Operation
Jericho is worthy of its own movie – made by Quinten Tarantino. The British conceived a raid on a German
prison camp at Amiens in France. The
goal was to set free French Resistance members and political prisoners. But instead of dropping spoons for them to
dig tunnels, someone with a very high opinion on the efficacy of air bombing
thought of the idea of using bombs to breach the walls around the facility and
open the walls of the building housing the prisoners. Also, the guards’ mess hall was to be
bombed. The mission had to be moved up
when intelligence revealed that a large number of prisoners were to be executed
on Feb. 19, 1944. A squadron of
Mosquitoes undertook the mission on Feb. 18.
The bombs did the trick and 258 of the 717 inmates were able to
escape. 102 were killed and the leader of
the flight was shot down and killed.
Unfortunately, two-thirds of the escapees were recaptured. The operation is shrouded in controversy and
mystery. Noone has claimed credit for
ordering it.
Share your feelings on both. I remember seeing them when they first opened in the theaters. Mosquitos!! This will be great!! When I rewatched as an adult, I couldn't believe how bad they each were. Really, really bad.
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